Recently went on a fishing trip to Baja Sur, Mexico. Found I was not well informed about productive locations and was advised by a local to look into getting a guide to enhance my trip.

I asked a local, “where do I get a guide ”

The local said, “at Get-A-Guide."

I asked, "where's Get-A-Guide

The local didn’t know. So, I went looking for the Yellow Pages. I found Get-A-Guide under “Guides” and wrote down the address. Since I didn’t have a vehicle with me, I hailed a cab and asked the driver to take me to Get-A-Guide to get a guide. The driver complied.

As we parked, I noticed the advertisement over the door read, “Get a Guide at Get-A-Guide, Satisfaction Guaranteed.” I entered the office.

At the front desk was a man dressed in khaki’s with a name plate that indicated he was the manager. I said, “I want to get a guide.”

He said, “Soooo, you’re looking for a guide.

I asked, “How much do you charge for a Guide from get-A-Guide ” we negotiated a price per hour and I paid the fee.

The manager said, “I have just the guide you’re looking for. His name is Guido.”

I asked, “Guido the guide ”

The manager said, “Yes, Guido the guide from Get-A-Guide.” (I was thinking of using Guibord for the name but didn’t know if Andy would approve :P )

We, Guido and I, loaded the gear and went fishing in a Panga. After buying bait, Guido decided that we should fish for Sharks. I agreed as he was the guide from Get-A-Guide…. What else could I do

At the first stop we caught some “Skeepies and Jello’s” , according to Guido, but no Sharks. We moved. At the second stop, we caught Dorado and Toro, again according to Guido . At the third stop we caught Pez Gallo but still no Sharks . This continued until about 2:00 PM, it was very hot and Guido decided to take a swim. Guido had barely hit the water when there was a tremendous disturbance in the waters surface and a loud scream!!! When I looked over the gunwale, there was Guido’s hat but no Guido…

I retrieved Guido’s hat and returned to Get-A-Guide to report the event. I gave a report and the hat to the manager of Get-A-Guide. He noted the loss in a ledger and threw the hat into a neat pile behind the counter. Then the manager said to the line-up of prospective guides, “next.”

In case you thought I did this whole thing on my own, it is an adaption from a routine done by comedian, Jackie Mason in the late 60’s. I just hadda do it… :P :P