Report from the Great Northwest

[OregonSalmon]

Unfortunatly Oregon is experiencing an attack of illegal imigrants across our once safe border. A Kalyiforniainaanina (Bill King) has seaped through the cracks bent hell to leather to torment our fish. He has had little success though the Oregon fish are determined to give him a chance. Once again, the talent you boys ship up here is not up to grade. I'm not sure if I give him a grade of "C" (the ex-first letter of the state" or a "K" (life according to Arnold). All I do know is that he blames all mishaps on the river on my flies. Think I'll give him an "O" for Oregon which also has another meaning and I'm not thinking orgasm.

Life is so bad I had to show Mormons how to dig clams. Those kids can knock on your door with passion early in the morning but they cannot pound the sand with vigor. We discussed the religion and this heathen agreed on the big points. My only hurdle: they didn't like my slugging down beers. Had to tell them that is a deal breaker. Very nice people but I had to be truthful that my salvation lies in hops and barely and when the ocean takes me I'll just be going back to whence I came. I crawled out so it is only fair I crawl back in. Keep the ledger straight.

"You make the Lord VERY nervous!!!......-Martin Short

[sculpin]

Hey OS
I just remembered I saw you ask a question about Ana Reservoir on another thread. There are or were Wipers in that lake 5 years ago and the pictures in the little stores around there were of fish in the teens. They can't reproduce and I have no idea if they are still stocked there. Also the Wipers were in Ten Mile Lake out of Coos bay. Anyway about 5 years ago during February I went out there with my son who lives in Bend while I was over there visiting for something to do. We hit a store towards Paisley from the lake and got a little info and some Sardines which the guy said was the ticket. He also said February was the best month and at night was the best time. The wind howls there and puts the wind chill below zero fast so we really didn't soak sardines for to long with no luck. The lake itself is really very small. The river is nice but it is on the list of approved places for folks from Portland to go so the fish are educated. PM me if you want some info on where to catch some really nice fish in small water in that general area of the state.

Mark

[OregonSalmon]

Hey Sculpin,
Yeah, I forgot that they don't reproduce. There were some nice fish in the res and I have no idea if they have kept up the program. It is a real neat little spot with little pressure but the wind does howl out there and wintertime is time to to. The river is a real cutie. Very unigue.

Lots of hoodoo and voodoo out there in the desert. A long ways from nowhere. I have plenty of problematic fish here on the coast but thank you for the offer of sharing some spots. Neat area out there.

Start tying now for the fall. Already I'm putting on my salmon cap. As soon as I get twenty dozen tied three people will show up, drink my beer, pay me nothing and leave me with two flies....patterns they want duplicated. They treat me like the cheapest whore in the Great Northwest. Plus they steal my clams!!!....Sum's of Beeeches!!!

[Darian]

Ya know, a man can't stoop much lower than stealin' another man's clams.... :roll: :x Clam's (good ones) are hard to dig up.... :D :lol: :lol: